I was curled up on the couch, feeling miserable as the sun's rays filter through the living room blinds. My head was pounding and my throat felt like it was full of sand. I knew I wasn't at my best, but I had still wanted to go on that trip. I needed to clear my head of everything that was going on in my life, yet my father didn't want to risk my health — or everyone else's. He decided that it was better for me to stay home while the rest of the family traveled to Australia to visit our grandparents during spring break.

My whole world seemed to be crumbling around me, and not just because of the family trip. I couldn't believe that my boyfriend, the person I trusted the most in this world, cheated on me.

I thought I could at least forget about it on the long flight to Australia, but I can't even accompany my father to the airport.

At first, I was more than a little upset about my dad's decision, but I realized it didn't make sense to put the rest of the family at risk of catching my flu. My older stepbrother, Ryan, was also home on spring break from college, and my dad had decided that he would be my "caretaker" while everyone was away.

Eighteen years old and stuck home like a sick little kid.

I wonder how I will ever be able to trust anyone again. All the promises and plans we had made together feel like empty lies now. But I also felt a burning anger.

I was a little nervous about the idea of being left alone with Ryan. After all, we weren't really siblings, and we hadn't spent much time together in years. Things always got weird fast between us. Every time he looked at me, my stomach tingled and I wondered what was going through his head. I suddenly remembered what had happened a year ago.

One night, as we were sitting on the couch watching a horror movie, I'd felt his hand brush mine. My heart was pounding in my chest as I wondered what to do, should I pull my hand away or leave it there and see what happened? Before I could say or do anything, Ryan suddenly pulled away. Could he have noticed my thoughts?

"It's time for bed," he said, as if nothing unusual had happened, and walked away toward his room.

After that, things never seemed to stop being strange.

I had to stop thinking about that day, but even when I remembered it my heart was beating out of control.

I talked on the phone with my best friend, Emily, trying to pass the time. We were still trying to figure out who the girl was he was cheating on me with all this time — a picture of her back and a few rumors were not enough to know for sure.

But now, Emily had a crazy idea: bring her brother to my house and pretend we were having a great night together to make my ex-boyfriend jealous. Some pictures on social media would help us with the lie. I wasn't sure if this was the best idea, but at that point, I had nothing to lose and I guessed it could be fun.

I had to get ready before they arrives so that the charade has more credibility, I looked at myself in my bedroom mirror and observed my reflection with a critical eye. My hazel eyes were my most obvious feature, and although they were not large or round, they had always been the most striking thing about my face. My dark, wavy hair fell over my shoulders in a messy natural style. I didn't usually wear a lot of makeup, but I did apply a little blush to give my sickly pale cheeks a pop of color. Sometimes when I looked in the mirror, I wished I had more confidence in my appearance, but for now, I was content with being myself and felt comfortable in my own skin.

When Emily and her brother arrived, quicker than I thought they would, they snapped me out of my funk, along with a perfect excuse for when Ryan arrived: "We just came to bring her homework."

As the night wore on, I began to realize that maybe there was something more between me and Zack. When I first met him I had found him cute, but no more than that. Now, however, I couldn't help but feel a strange attraction.

We were in my room, playing board games and laughing. I tried to keep myself from getting carried away with my thoughts. But to no avail.

"What's wrong, Samantha? You seem to be lost in your thoughts," Zack mentioned with a shy smile on his face.

"Oh, it's nothing. I was just...thinking about how much fun it is to be with you."

"I like spending time with you too. You're a lot of fun."

My face flushed at his words.

Suddenly, we heard the front door open and close. I knew it was Ryan, who had just come back from seeing his friends.

When he walked into my room and saw us all laughing together, his expression changed to one of anger. I realized I'd never seen him like that before, and I was surprised at how much his reaction affected me.

I tried to explain to him that they both came to bring me homework, but he didn't seem to care. I couldn't help but feel a little confused by his reaction. "Ryan, what's wrong? Why are you so angry?"

"Tell me the truth, what's going on here? And who is that guy you're laughing with?"

"Who are you, Dad? He's just a friend. We were playing board games."

"I don't care if he's just a friend. I don't like to see you laughing with other guys."

"Ryan, it's not like we were doing anything wrong. We were just hanging out."

"I don't want you anywhere near him. Besides, aren't you sick? You shouldn't be having anyone over."

Emily and Zack decided it was time to leave. I could feel their concern for the tension between us.

"Sorry," Emily mouthed to me as she left.

As they both left, I felt the room get smaller. We were alone now, and I could feel his presence close to me. Finally, he walked up to me and looked intensely into my eyes. The tension between us was palpable, and I could feel his body moving dangerously close to mine. Suddenly, it felt like he was about to kiss me, and my heart was hammering in my chest.

I felt completely caught up in the moment, unable to think of anything but the closeness of his body. His lips were only inches from mine, and I could feel his hot breath on my face.

My mind was racing, trying to find a way to resist the attraction I felt. I knew this wasn't right, that I shouldn't be feeling this for my brother. Or actually, stepbrother, but the chemistry between us was so intense that I couldn't ignore it. Finally, he pulled away from me a little, leaving a trail of electricity in the air.

"Why don't you trust me?" I asked Ryan, feeling the frustration in my voice.

"Of course I trust you!" he replied, his voice rising in volume. "But I don't trust other guys who get too close to you."

"It's not like I'm doing anything wrong," I insisted, "You don't think I'm capable of making my own decisions and choosing who I want to be with. I'm old enough to know what's right and what's wrong. I can't keep living under your or my father's overprotective rules."

"I care about you, Samantha. And I don't want you to get hurt, understand." His eyes burned with an intensity that made me feel vulnerable and exposed. Today he was different than usual; he looked much more mature. "I'm sorry," he murmured, "I shouldn't have done that."

"Don't worry about it," I replied in a shaky voice. "I'm sorry too."

Our eyes didn't part. We were alone in this room, caught in a dangerous tension that neither of us wanted to let go of. Suddenly, Ryan pulled completely away from me. I could feel his energy shifting, as if there was something else on his mind. He was silent for a moment, then cleared his throat.

"It was a mistake," he said, and I could feel his regret in his words.

"You don't have to apologize, Ryan. I just..." I replied, trying to keep my voice calm despite the sense of disappointment that came over me, and not knowing how to complete the sentence.

Ryan sighed and moved toward the door to leave. "I won't do that again," he said, and walked away from me.

I left my room annoyed and went straight to the kitchen as I listened to Ryan's bedroom door lock. I felt relieved and sad at the same time. Was the attraction I felt for him real? I wasn't not sure, but I knew I couldn't let it affect our family relationship. I couldn't help but feel a knot in my stomach at the thought of how overprotective he had become of me lately. It wasn't like Zack was a stranger. He'd been my friend almost as long as Emily, and he was also friends with Ryan — but Ryan seemed to think that just because he was a guy, he didn't belong in my room.

As I walked down the hallway I got a text on my phone from an unknown number, I ignored it without giving it much thought; I couldn't help but think about the words from a moment ago that were still on my mind. What if I had been braver and risked following my feelings at that moment? What would have happened, would it have been worth it?

I stopped in the kitchen and leaned against the counter, trying to control my breathing. If only I could have had something positive in my life right then, something that made me feel good, something that made me feel alive. But no, first the flu at the worst time possible, then... whatever tonight was.

It seemed the universe was hell-bent on conspiring against me.

Why should Ryan be so involved in my life? It's like I couldn't have my own personal space without him having a say in it. Why did he have to try and control everything I did? I felt like I was living in a prison and he was my keeper.

The phone wouldn't stop buzzing from the incoming messages.

I was shocked to read what had arrived. I didn't know who'd sent it, but I thought it was just another spam from some phone company trying to sell me something.

I was so, so wrong.

The message said my now ex-boyfriend was not only cheating on me, but cheating on me with my friend Lily, the captain of the softball team. The news hit me hard and left me not knowing what to do.

I wrote back quickly with trembling fingers:

-Who are you and how do you have my number?

The silence while I waited for a reply was so thick I could hear my own heartbeat.